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The Food Dude: Pastafarian potluck

Terry Bursey makes Mom's Spaghetti.
Mom's Spaghetti.

Human beings are wonderful, aren’t they?

With such a diverse mix of cultures, religions and beliefs there’s little reason to get bored when meeting new people.

I was once invited to a rather unusual potluck. While most potlucks have little to no rules regarding the food you could bring to the table, this particular crowd of foodies imposed an odd limitation – every food item had to be a kind of pasta. Curious, I asked my friend what was up with the weirdness and she explained to a blissfully ignorant Terry all about “Pastafarians.”

It turned out these friends were among a unique and officially legitimized religious group that worshipped a god called “The Flying Spaghetti Monster.” They routinely donned strainers as holy hats, ate spaghetti and other noodles whenever possible, and had some pretty fun prayers which I shan’t repeat here.

Initially I thought it was a joke, and depending on the Pastafarian you ask, they may confess that Pastafarianism is nothing more way for atheists and agnostics to poke fun at religion.

When I arrived at the party with a large earthenware dish of Mom’s Spaghetti and wearing a colander, I quickly became aware that these Pastafarians took their religion seriously.

Some poor fellow and his particularly giggly wife not only turned up without wearing strainers on their heads but had brought a cake with a Rastafarian theme instead of a noodley entre.

They were abruptly labelled as heretics, forced from the apartment building and their cake was dropped from the balcony onto their unprotected heads as they fled to their car.

Once this awkward moment passed, we all said the weirdest grace in the world, and feasted on:

Mom’s Spaghetti

Ingredients:

- 1 lb. lean ground beef

- 1lb. ground pork

- 1/3 package lean bacon, diced

- 1 large onion, diced

- 2 cans whole mushrooms

- 2 cups of bell peppers, diced

- 2 tbsp minced garlic

- 2 tbsp Italian seasoning

- 1 can tomato soup

- 1 can original tomato sauce

- ½ cup ketchup

- ½ a package dry spaghetti

Directions:

- In a large pan, fry diced bacon on medium-high heat until fully cooked and fat is rendered.

- Add peppers, onion, beef and pork and cook for 12 minutes.

- In a large pot on medium-high heat, transfer contents of pan and add remaining ingredients and bring to a simmer.

- Reduce heat to medium-low and continue to cook while covered for roughly 12 minutes.

- In another large pot, bring three litres of salted water to a boil and add noodles. Stir frequently to avoid sticking and cook for 10 minutes or until pasta is al dente. Drain and serve immediately with sauce.

As the night wore on, I learned the couple were relatives of our hosts. Apparently, the show of blasphemy was planned and performed with above-average thespian skills simply for the fun of it.

My friend and I were among fellow atheists and agnostics who just happened to like spaghetti a great deal and didn’t let social convention stop them from having a unique party.

If you’re skeptical of this article (and I applaud your skepticism), feel free to give Pastafarians a quick Google. Trust me. It’s worth it.

Happy slurping!

thefooddudecolumn@gmail.com

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